When news of the world becomes overwhelming, I’m shifting to giving more of my deliberation to things I CAN control, and less deliberation to those which I can not control.

In between reading the required books for my book club, I fit in my own personal reading. Something I seldom do is re-read a book and I’ve recently done just that. The first time I read Sean Tucker’s, “The Meaning in the Making” I wasn’t at all surprised how much his ideas and philosophy made sense. But in re-reading it, I’ve gleaned so much more the second time around. One of the chapters, “Control” for instance, talks about the difference between the things we have no control over and those that we do have control over. He gave several examples in terms of creativity or making that made such sense. His points also apply to life in general.

There was a recent article online by Jo Kneale in which she referenced Steven Covey’s Circle of Concern (things we often waste time and energy worrying about such as disquieting news or the nonsense and vitriol that is posted online) contrasting it with the Circle of Control (that which in reality we do have control over). Those aspects of control were exactly the kind of thing Sean Tucker had dedicated a chapter to in his book.

In the Kneale article, the segment that really hit home for me was a list of actions she literally has written down for times when she intentionally keeps away from television, internet, and all that agitating noise. I may not find all of her personal list items would be on my list though, surprisingly, we certainly jive with some of them: sitting down to write in a journal or write a letter to a friend/family member; read a book; listen to music; craft/make something (baking works too); even completing a household chore. Of course everyone will have their own ideas to add to such a list which could include anything from meeting with a friend for some conversation; gardening; putting old snapshots into an album; learning a new language, and so on. As James Clear says about removing ourselves from the TV or Internet, “That means you have more mental space to use for creating art, starting a business, having meaningful conversations, or otherwise contributing to the world around you.”

What really hit home for me, both from Tucker’s and Kneale’s writings, is rather than disconnecting by perhaps watching mindless TV or (worse) scrolling the Internet, their solutions are actions — do something else. Something that, simple as it may be, is constructive. The bonus to taking that direction is that there’s a reward in it for us. The reward is what we have made or accomplished along with a balancing of emotion — an inner ease.

I’m not running away or hiding from news of the world. But I do recognize it’s not healthy to focus on it to the point of inducing anxiety over that which I cannot control. I’m shifting to giving more of my concentration on things I CAN control, and less to those which I can not control.

Remember, the entrance door to the sanctuary is inside you.

Rumi

5 thoughts on “we have the control”

  1. i wrote a lengthier comment but removed it. : – ) i agree, in that, i have to take the world in small doses.

    i was reminded of a quote that i kept in my collection.

    Powerless is the inability to alter your future.
    Bill Clinton said that

    a wonderful post with terrific thoughts

  2. I am old enough to remember life before the internet. I also very clearly remember the fascination it held for me, and the hours I spent searching for everything and anything. I spent the winter cutting way back on my time online, cleaned out my inbox, and made it a point to put my phone someplace where I could find it, but not use it for random scrolling. I am amazed at what a little boredom has done for my mindset.

  3. yes to everything you say. Those pictures of food are lovely, well all of them are. The chair looks especially inviting! But the food, as I love the making of it too, just filled me with delight. are those pictures of things you have made?

  4. Your photos and words speak directly to my heart in this post. Like your friend Steven, I feel some sort of guilt for not worrying or keeping up with the world-at-large, as though that lack of worry in some way means that I do not care. But I can care without care-taking. I’ve recently come to understand that my first thought – “I should keep up on what’s going on” – is the one that is automatic, and comes to me as a “should” or some expectation. My second thought, on the other hand, is a more considered one, one that is truly mine rather than something I’ve learned by way of society or culture. And so my second thoughts match yours. As Sean Tucker describes, I will create order from chaos by making. And I love your photos of food and letter writing and the many ways we grace this world with love.

  5. Delectable photos accompanied by beautiful stationery ones! I am with you on things I cannot control, especially with the war. But I feel a sense of guilt by not keeping up because it makes me feel like I don’t care what is happening to the people most affected. After reading the info at the link, Sean Tucker’s book sounds like a great read. Thank you for sharing!

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